CAMP A LOW HUM 2008 (slightly updated)

Hello, this will be an attempt to cover the five days of Camp A Low Hum 2008 and all that it entailed. It has the potential to dissolve into a 'how to make a complete mess of yourself' guide, but I will try and steer it in the direction of CRIPES THAT WAS FUN. A brief summary? Yes of course.

It wasn't until after one o'clock in the afternoon that we departed from Auckland to head South to 'five minutes outside Levin / something about a service station'. Oh jeepers, last year we set ourselves up nice and early in a well-picked spot. This year it was more a case of getting our tents up before we were soaked through to the skin and sleeping in puddles. As it would have it, as soon as it stopped raining we had just pushed in the final pegs.

TIME TO SCOUT THE CAMP.

Arriving at night we were greeted by the swirling coloured lights and a hoard of already rather jolly campers. It was set to be a good few days, yes, yes.

We started the day with gin and a swim for breakfast. I think that really set the tone.

I'd been told the night before that So So Modern were doing a live-link from somewhere in the States. Rather excited, I bounced out of bed and up to the main stage where LOW AND BEHOLD So So Modern lauched out of the big house in person. I did lunges somewhere near the back with Jo. Pikelet introduced me to the Nice Stage. It was... well, nice. Stage invasions were banned after the first one that occured during TeenWolf's rampage. Get on the stage? YES. Get off the stage? I didn't hear you?

The amount of stages had me (and my distinct lack of time or concern for planning) a wee bit disorientated. I did manage to catch Mean Street upstairs on the tiny noisy stage. Question: WHY WAS EVERYONE SITTING DOWN? Okay, then the crowd went wild for Conjurors.

Steve Abel provided a pleasant moment of swaying before The Reduction Agents sent everyone's feet stomping and voices screaming. I now own a growl, not a voice.

"we're never going to let you down" ?

This moment was literally out of focus and as much fun as is depicted.

The first day had more to offer. I spent the majority of Liam Finn's set singing my own interpretations of the songs and adding alternative percussion at the side of stage. It took the entire set, but Susan was eventually convinced up on stage. Run up the stairs - onto the stage - dance - SONG ENDS - oh jesus I'm on stage - round of applause.

Guess who I ran into while waiting for the use of a bathroom?

Ant and I decided it was the appropriate moment for an adventure away from the stages. After romping through fields and over bridges we decided it was be hilarious to pose for photos on the railway tracks. "This will be great, it will look really dangerous." Ah, it sure will. It sure will.

Come to think of it, so was trying to eat from the food-providers. The food was lovely. Unfortunately I had a still-unknown run-in with one of my many allergies and set myself a menu of two-minute noodles and tuna for the rest of camp. You may have seen me in the mornings looking decidedly unimpressed at a pot of flavourless noodles.

I can't remember anything but having an exceptionally fun time by this point. Details? Ah, no, apparently I didn't think I needed them.

The Cosbys brought back everything I loved about them. Their live e.p. / mini album remains my favourite purchase from the merch room. Panties for one and all. Bare feet for many. Dancing in the gravel was tops.

NIGHT ONE COMPLETE: escorted to tent.

The order of events is a bit muddled, but DAY TWO brought Steve Abel to wake me up and Reductions Agents to get me going. Disciples of Macca were wonderful and brought to my attention how few McCartney songs I know the words to. To be fixed.

A POOL PARTY occured when the sun was high and Mega Chain Gang brought on Disasteradio WHILE WE WERE IN THE POOL, WITH TOYS, IN THE POOL WITH INFLATABLE TOYS. GOOD LORD. IT WAS EXCELLENT.

Sam and I made a solid effort in the wheelbarrow race, tumbled back into the pool, and the then promptly ran across camp (squeaking in soggy togs and wet jandals) to The Conjurors up on the Noisy Stage. It really was noisy and fantastic.

It was certainly too hot for pants.

Oh, look, it's Lawrence Arabia.

Look left...

It's Samuel Flynn Scott.

Try and get me a bit more excited, just try it.

Throw in some Brunettes...

...some expensive bFM recording equipment, The Phoenix Foundation... and that might just about do it.

Once again, the late night haze hits me and details are wiped from my memory. However, I do remember making my way towards the lazers and neon shining out of the forest of pine trees. I stumbled into the forest rave - I assume that I made a fool of myself - and then danced back to our tents for some much needed sleep.

DAY TWO COMPLETE: the pain in most people's muscles is explained.

DAY THREE: spooning.

As much as I thought camp last year could have gone on forever and I would have been happy forever, I think this year's extra day proved that I may have been mistaken. Admittedly, this was the second-to-last day, but I felt rough.

Thankfully my stomach didn't stage its rebellion until after Brand New Math's pajama party on the main stage. While the word about the pajamas didn't spread very far, it definitely made it to the right places. Namely, shirtless Tim made his debut.

Grayson Gilmore was what I felt like and he played, which was good. As was Somethingorrather: Gus and Jamie of Architecture in Helsinki. This is the part when I shake you and press my nose against yours with a tear running down my cheek while questioning why you didn't come to camp (if you didn't). Ant turned the same shade as his red wine and I had a rest to one of the best renditions of 'Too Hot For Pants Tonight'.

Little Pictures were neat. Yes, yes it was ALL NEAT. The entirety of camp was neat - even the pathetic and sick moments were still neat as I was pathetic and sick in front of...

WHOA. We turned up for Lawrence Arabia on the Nice Stage, to be followed by Samuel Flynn Scott. What we received relieved me of my illness and wiped a grin across my face - a Lawrence Arabia, Samuel Flynn Scott, and Liam Finn three-piece.

Their songs that they did on own were brilliant and it rounded up with my favourite Chuck Berry number - teenage wedding - and a twist off. Although, the brief sexual feeling mumbling cover is worth mentioning and so is the Crawley Song - gee crawley, kissing all those bumblebees, you'll get an S T BBBBBEEEEEEEE. Oh hah hah.

While I was bringing sober to the party, Adele made the best meal I ate at camp and for that I still owe her. We met some interesting characters in the kitchen - they mostly gave us instructions we didn't need, but the thought was nice.

The Ruby Suns set packed a bit of a sad on the technical front (the rain sent me under the shelter of the house). Last night though (back in Auckland for their album release) they made up for it ten-fold. Anyway, they looked fantastic.

I still think Amee and Imogen should have gone for the topless look again though.

Adele was looking for a party and was proving unimpressed with the lack-of-party that I was providing UNTIL WE FOUND TIM. He was having his shirt ripped off him as we approached. The next half hour was a series of tumbles and spanish and a whole lot of insightful words from his chest hair.

The chest hair directed us towards the Party Stage for the Zombie Party and some TeenWolf. They really are an exceptional band. Horror-bull - inappropriate joke that was relevant on the trip down. I liked them as much as 'rowdy tim', which is saying something.

I walked away with tears of fake blood running down my face.

It didn't end there though...

...walking past the pool to grab some snacks I saw it coming. SMACK. Straight into the volleyball net at full speed. Later in the toilets I was told that said runner was alright, just a cut lip. It was a spectacular hit.

Back at the camp fire Petra Jane started talking about Unicorns mating while Carl and Ants bounced about the circle. A lady then approached who said "Would you guys like to come to another bonfire? You're exactly the people I've been looking for."

Who were we to decline?

Three of us were led around and about camp, out the back, over the bridge, past the flying fox, down the unsteady hill, somewhere near the confidence course (no torches)... Ant then said "Bloody hell, I'm really REALLY tired, WHERE ARE YOU TAKING US?" To this the lady asked if we were capable of being quiet... well, no... look at us. We're covered in fake blood.

We were led into a clear of pine trees where there was in fact a bonfire, but not a lit one.

Turns out she had spent all afternoon building it. I still haven't quite worked out why she wanted us there. Just us. No one else. After a long time she set it on fire.

Then she proceeded to wander to the other side of the circle, stand on the logs, raise her arms and remain in that position with her robes billowing for a considerable amount of time.

You can almost make her out behind the fire.

Feeling rather uncomfortable - and anticipating robed friends emerging out of the pines to sacrifice us to the fire lord - we broke the quiet rule and burst into renditions of our favourite Lion King songs. This attracted a few more people who were wandering by and we escorted ourselves out.

I tucked myself into my sleeping bag feeling bemused and (at close to 3:00am) tried to get an earlier night in. I was promptly woken by the BBBOOOOOOOOOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP of jordy, tim, adele, petra, tanya, rebecca, and - I assume by the chorus of laughter and amount of splashing - a fair few others in the pool without their pants on.

Fear of missing out hit me in the face and I unzipped the bottom of my sleeping bag, stood up, and wandered outside to investigate. Spying my face, adele insisted I clean it. "You will not want blood on your face in the morning Hannah." Trrruuuue.

In the end I fell asleep to the sound of adele and alex in fits of giggles in their seperate tents and the HOOOOOOT HOOTS of my brother's car. There were reportedly 100 or so campers having a boot party at my brother's car with music supplied by the Architecture in Helsinki boys.

That, is why the fear of missing out is a good thing.

It was also a good thing that I was so tired I had no fear. None at all. I was set for DAY FOUR.

We crawled out of our tents to the sound of Soulja Boy Crank Dat. I had conveniently fallen asleep in my jeans and singlet, so threw on my bathing ape hoodie and sprinted to the nice stage for aerobics with Dancing Stevie and dance moves led by Brad. Laughs and A Half.

We don't superman those hoes, we spiderman those hoes.

THAT'S DISGUSTING.

The Ragamuffin Children sank their song about an alien friend deeper and deeper into my head (to the point that it was the song looping my head as we exited the camp ground on the last day). The Teacups, or the twocups and Sam aptly named them, sang too and it was as charming as it always is when they are performing.

I enjoy having a brother that constantly provides entertainment. A few people have previously scoffed when I've told them that I am merely a poor copy of Carl. It is true, you see! Exclamation. The Twocups did their own set on the Nice Stage and I felt awful about ducking away from it.

However, I was heading to see Princess Chelsea. There is a distinct possibility that she will never perform those songs again in a place where I can be an audience member. Twice through the songs and we were OUTSIDE AGAIN.

Well, yep. It is camp.

Oh look, I found brad again. Hi brad.

Again I ask: WHY WAS EVERYONE SITTING DOWN? I almost launched to my feet for a stomp about to Brand New Math, but then realised that the only other dancer was the hippy lady I had seen doing yoga that morning. Pass.

Serious Susan.

Despite most... all? Holiday With Friends were in attendance, but they weren't playing. So to the lions lodge we all headed and swayed about a bit and got some stuff in our eyes.

The Tape Men played at some point and I loved it, but I don't know when it was. It was sunny.

BOX WARS (to Tiger Tones).

I think I heard someone say "DIE BITCH".

RADIO WARS was then upon us. Jose did a stunning job with the paintball gun, I let the bFM team down entirely. It seems my drunken confidence does not extend to actual talent - especially when I have never fired a gun before. BUT, I was SuperHannah, I had to do it.

We came second or third. bFM had the best costumes though and we ran first. I should explain: the war between the radios involved teams of two shooting at various singer/songwriters who we all want to mame (jack johnson, james blunt...). Five shots per person. I missed all five.

Jose and I both bolted to knock down the faces first. After realising that jose was heading across my path toward Jack, I went to turn towards James Blunt. I thought that I had successfully made it over him - turns out I kneed him in the eye and broke his glasses.

One metre, or so, out from James Blunt I realised he had a chair behind him. Not wanting to end up in tears, I jumped up and kicked him in the nose while in the air, landed on my knees, and skidded up some serious grass stains.

I still haven't removed the stains, but I did kick James Blunt in the face.

Think of almost everything you'd like to take and this gun does it.

ANT WHIPPED OUT HIS PARTY TENT.

So So Modern played in the center of the Nice Stage. Whoa. Whoa.

Well, what would you wear?

Favourite photo of camp. Thanks Andrew, you stunner.

Disasteradio/DJ Alphabethead. Ohmygod.

My prom date found another prom date. Look how pleased he is.

The Nice Stage presented Sheba Williams. OH, Oh OH OH. Ah kooooooo.

BLACK LIPS. WINE LIPS.

HEY LOOK IT'S D-RAD.

The battle of Sam versus Super Hannah was epic. This photo would tell you that Super Hannah not only lost, but spilt a lot of liquid on her pants. I did spill a lot. I won't tell you I lost though. I just needed a lie down.

PROM NIGHT.

HOT DATE.

I believe that Chopper Dan and Timothy Neil are demonstrating the Kame Hame stance often adopted during Dragonball and Dragonball Z. Ask me about it sometime. It has proved to be an excellent waterfight technique.

Ladybird always makes it in somehow. Speaking of that... so does Liam...

DAY FOUR COMPLETE.

DAY FIVE: are you still alive?

Potentially no.

The power of camp is still strong in some of us. Fly tent, fly.

At some point I'll write up about our trip home. It involves climbing Ruapehu, a homoerotic backpackers, a dinosaur slide, an octopus swing, and a whole lot of burgers.

Once again, I love camp.